you are what you love: love will be the death of me

there's something about the smell of coffee after a long and sleepless night that just finds a way to excite me. i simply do not understand it and have never had this feeling before. i like it though. its unique this way that the smell of coffee makes me feel. maybe it makes me nostalgic for the way mr. ettlebrick used to walk into the classroom smelling like coffee when i was back in 8th grade or the way that i associate it with the library at school (&& the way i LOVE how libraries, banks, etc. smell).

i read in my bed while the sun rose this morning and the birds began chirping and it felt so very surreal. i felt like i was the character in a movie. sometimes, i get so lost in the world that is my apartment that i wonder if the world has ended and i'm the only one alive. some days, i admit i walk outside just to make sure there are still people moving about around this town. it's a strange feeling, but i get it quite often.

i tossed and turned almost the whole night through, but it's days like this that i feel ultimately refreshed. it's like it makes me question why we sleep. why must we confine ourselves to the hours of daytime when the night is so unique and filled with that pleasant solitude that i so love to enjoy.

i was looking at pictures of kitties today (after my mom told me a story of our kitty hiding herself in the cabinet--back in some unreachable space, enjoying her own solitude i'm sure). i miss my little kitty very much and i'm extremely excited to be going home to see her. i'm sure she will absolutely not share the same affection for my arrival home, but i guess that's my fault for always wanting to hold her and cuddle her because i wanted her so so badly back in 4th grade. anyway...i realize that no matter what manner of mood i am in, a picture of a kitty (in the absence of a real one) will ultimately cheer me. it's fabulous.

well. i suppose i'll find something else to do...so much time on my hands in this immediate future. enjoy these pictures of kitties too!