I couldn't sleep last night. I always tend to do my best thinking when this happens. And it did not disappoint. You know, I was thinking about my last post and all of my frustrations with the education system, what I doing, and what I am not doing. And then, I had this sudden epiphany. What the hell am I complaining about?! Maybe it was something of a critique (i.e. grad school leaving little room for the care of myself and others), but it was also largely a complaint.
And I am sort of angry at myself for forgetting what an incredible privilege it is to be able to attend graduate school at all. How lucky was I to have gone to college AND I am going to graduate school? A lot of people desire that and strive to do that, but never end up there because lack of time, tools, or resources. And here I am enjoying my privilege and not recognizing what a gift education really is. So, I would like to remain true to my last post by leaving it up--I am not satisfied with the way this system operates. However, I want to make it known (most especially to myself) that I am working with an incredible opportunity and I cannot be blind to the fact that it does not always happen like this for everyone. This is still a privilege and recognizing one's privilege and therefore, advantages, over others is essential to a more socially just society. I guess what I want to say is this: I have worked long and hard to get here, but I understand that it does take certain resources, encouragement, and ability. I am so incredibly appreciative of my position within the graduate program. And I am equally grateful for my experiences at U of I. While I do have a problem with the rules and regulations of the institution, I cannot for one second forget all of the people that I know who wish for this kind of education--those who wanted to go to school but did not have the ability to do so.
sweeter dreams.
k
And I am sort of angry at myself for forgetting what an incredible privilege it is to be able to attend graduate school at all. How lucky was I to have gone to college AND I am going to graduate school? A lot of people desire that and strive to do that, but never end up there because lack of time, tools, or resources. And here I am enjoying my privilege and not recognizing what a gift education really is. So, I would like to remain true to my last post by leaving it up--I am not satisfied with the way this system operates. However, I want to make it known (most especially to myself) that I am working with an incredible opportunity and I cannot be blind to the fact that it does not always happen like this for everyone. This is still a privilege and recognizing one's privilege and therefore, advantages, over others is essential to a more socially just society. I guess what I want to say is this: I have worked long and hard to get here, but I understand that it does take certain resources, encouragement, and ability. I am so incredibly appreciative of my position within the graduate program. And I am equally grateful for my experiences at U of I. While I do have a problem with the rules and regulations of the institution, I cannot for one second forget all of the people that I know who wish for this kind of education--those who wanted to go to school but did not have the ability to do so.
sweeter dreams.
k
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